Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Dilemma
I have a dilemma....my daughter is moving beyond being sassy in a cute way...to braty. I hate to say it but she really is. I am hoping its just her age and that she will grow out of it, but in the mean time I want to rip my hair out! She throws HUGE tantrums over EVERYTHING. If she doesn't get HER way....just like she wants it...look out. You can expect her to begin SOBBING, throw herself on the floor and then she will gets this look on her face of SERIOUS anger. Which she then will walk right up to my face and HIT me. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!! I refuse to have the child that thinks she can act that way, and get away with it. I WILL NOT have a spoiled bratty girl. My dilemma is that I don't know the best way to punish her for this behavior. I don't feel like she totally understands time out. When I put her in time out she gets up and if I hold her down it escalates the situation big time. I also don't want to spank her because I feel like that defeats the purpose in me telling her she can't hit me. If i ignore her hitting I fear it will get worse. SO I need some advice on what worked for any of you. She is 20 months going on 16 and I just hope that I can get this all under control, as much as possible, before I have a crying infant needing my attention as well.
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8 comments:
Oh Amanda your not alone! Easton fought us also with time out. All I can say is be persistent! You and Brandon have to be doing it the exact same way and exact same place every time. We always watched super nanny and we do time out that way. It works great now. It will get worse when your baby boy comes! GOOD LUCK :)
All kids go through this phase, so you are not alone. Just like Jill said, you have to be persistent in your time outs. Mean it and she will understand that she can't walk all over you. I think kids this age do understand time out but they are pushing you to the limit to see what they can pass by you.
I would put my kids in time out and set a timer according to their age. So you would do a minute for her. Afterwards I would talk {not too much} and explain why she was in time out.
Yeah, I'm kind of bad, I would make them stick their nose on the wall for time out. They hated it, but it worked. Hope this helps.
Oh Tessa Bessa! I agree with the people above. Persistance is the best way of handling the situation. You have to be more stubborn than her. If it takes 30 min before she stays in timeout, it takes 30 minutes (its taken 45 for Boston before) but you have to continue doing it until she understands. She won't learn it over night and let's be honest, NO KID likes timeout. She's old enough to understand. I started Boston in timeout at 18 months. You have to be the boss and stick with your guns or else she'll just take advantage if you give in and NEVER take you seriously.
Same as everybody above! Persistence is the ONLY way to get things under YOUR control! We started time outs with Taylee at 18 months and theres still times where we have a 20 minute time out cause she keeps getting off! But it's totally worth it when she know's I'm boss! Good Luck!
Laneah hit me ALL the time when she was Tessa's age. I would take her hand and press my thumb into her palm (not hard, but it is a pressure point and it makes them realize it is important) and look her in the eyes and tell her "hitting hurts mommy, we don't hit" After a few months (I know a long time), she hardly ever hits anymore. Tantrums are another story, but kids throw tantrums because they don't know how to express themselves. Get her a DVD on emotions (ex-Barney's Happy, Sad, MAd Dvd), it really helped Laneah. Tessa just has a feisty personality. As tough as it is, try not to take it personally and pray for lots of patience:)
I didnt know you had a Blog!! Cangrats on the baby boy, boys are fun. Tessa is SO BIG they grow up way to fast. You make being prego look good!
That is funny...I was just thinking of you the other day and wondering if you might have some answers for me. I feel the same way with Jocelyn and feel that my getting pregnant turned her into a monster somedays. I finally went and bought a kitchen timer and turn it on when she goes to time out, where she can see it, and she now stays until the timer goes off. I don't know why the microwave timer didn't work. I have also been putting my trust in the supper nanny show and just trying to learn from her and stick to it. It is hard and sad when your little baby girl acts like that but Jocelyn has been doing so much better. Hope that helps. Congrats on the little boy!! that will be so much fun. How are you liking Texas?
Glad to know I'm not alone with the sassy tantrums. Good luck. I think persistence is the key too, but I've realized that at 28 months, no amount of bribery or reasoning will get Ellis to do what I want (like get dressed -- she prefers to go without clothes), and I have to just make her do it. Just decide your strategy and be dedicated to it for a couple weeks before you reevaluate.
Congrats on the baby boy coming!
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